Sometimes Jesus told people to stop weeping because they weren't really dead, but he entered into grief with Mary and Martha.
As Christians we know that Jesus REALLY died. He didn't fall asleep. He wasn't in a coma. He wasn't napping on a boat like normal. He was dead. Dead dead. The kind of death that shocks people because it's unexpected (even though Jesus had told them it was going to happen). The kind of death where nobody makes a casserole because ALL the people who normally would have just lost their dearest and most precious friend.
Our Jesus knew how to enter grief. He knew how to experience grief. He did not pretend. He wept and mourned and was not afraid of acknowledging pain.
And just like us, He grieved differently in different times. When John died, he withdrew. Yet He saw crowds and chose to have compassion and heal their sick. Mourning compelled Him to love.
It's so easy (for me) to consider Easter and keep my hope-filled disposition.
The disciples gathered together to mourn. When Christ rose, the only one not gathered was the doubter (Thomas) and the betrayer (Judas). Even the denier (Peter) was there.
Jesus was dead.
How we mourn isn't the point. That we mourn is. Yes we have this hope! But missing the deep sorrow, it sure seems problematic to me.
How can I sing that nothing but the blood of Christ can wash away my sin if all I express is joy that He rose?
I say that as one who wants to dance around shouting WHY DO YOU LOOK FOR THE DEAD? HE IS RISEN!