I wrote this paragraph months ago:
"I keep having to re-throne the Lord. Because every time I get hit with a wave, I realize how much more of Jesus I need. I realize how broken I am, not only because of all that has happened, but also because my sin is great. Yet my Maker is greater. His faithfulness is more endless than the horizon seems to stretch, and his love is unending."
The words are still true.While what I wrote it about then is different now, the words still ring true. I'm still constantly, momentarily, daily, every other second, each hour, each time I forget - always having to re-throne Jesus.
I chatted with a pastor about a month ago about the anxiety that I had been struggling with at the time. Before he prayed for me, he reminded me of the sin that is linked with fear and with trying to take control. He encouraged me to repent of those sins and walk in the freedom that would come from that. Isn't that cool?
He reminded me that how often, as Christians, especially those who have been Christians for years, we have an easy tendency to be able to spot sin super well but often fail to confess them, repent of them, and turn from them.
. . .
I wrote these words as a draft about a month or so ago, months after reading that first paragraph. I pulled them out recently as I was doing a draft folder check to see if I'd written anything worth posting. I often write little notes down and save them for later. When I open them later, if they still ring true and seem to have a story to share I'll write more. Typically I read them and wonder what I was thinking that day and immediately hit delete.
As I read these words above I realized that God has so abundantly answered that prayer with peace. As soon as I repented and realized that my worry, fear, and consistent grasp for control was sin and needed to end, God granted immediate forgiveness, and day by day, those areas where I was living in worry and fear have ceased.
He's provided refuge from that storm.
God is faithful.
God is faithful.