What ever happened to that girl?

Is it odd that I hope people ask that question about me? What ever happened to that girl?

It's because I want to never be who I was just now. Other than noticing how awful that sentence was, do you catch what I mean?

For example:

The first thing He's done has been to convict my sinful heart that it wants to be the best Christian. Believe me when I say, that I'm that disciple asking who gets to sit beside Jesus in heaven. That's my heart.

Then, the most important thing He is doing (every single day since I forget this one several times a day) is showing me that I am always at step one. Step one is Jesus.

He's teaching me that there is a whole lot of stuff more important than just being accepted by people.

He's also teaching me that I am not called to live with hatred or with a heart that does not forgive. I'm called to live like Jesus. Jesus reminds me of these verses.

He's giving me opportunity after opportunity to share what He teaches.

He's bestowing joy upon my heart when I open His word. What ever happened to that girl?

He's calling me to be a part of things I never expected.

He's reminding me that everything I experience has a purpose. Everything, including the sorrow, the heartache, the loneliness, the joys, the laughter, the conversations, the education. The purpose is to make Him known and glorify Christ each day, regardless of circumstance.

He's speaking me out of a season of valley. He's filling me with living water and refreshing me deep into my bones.

He's showing me that in that long season where I felt like I was falling apart every single day, He was the reason why I still was a light for Him. This one is huge. My weak and frail soul isn't too weak to be used by the strength of a Saviour. His work, His words, His truth, my silly self moving speaking sharing. It's ridiculous. Grace blows my mind.

He's giving me peace over situations where I used to turmoil. He is my peace. I know that full well.

That enough? I hope not. My comfort seeking heart would love to be done. I'd love to be finished with the pruning. The pruning does not end. Being made like Jesus means dying to my self every day. This is not by my own strength. It is all through Christ - He gives me strength!

For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life. The saying is trustworthy, and I want you to insist on these things, so that those who have believed in God may be careful to devote themselves to good works. These things are excellent and profitable for people. (Titus 3:3-8)

So whatever happened to that girl? She used to be unsure of what she believed. She used to be timid. She used to need attention for herself.

What changed?

If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
(Colossians 3:1-4 ESV)

Also, when I read scripture, I want to add a "bam!" onto the end of everything.

Jesus loves you. BAM!