After the first week I walked away determined and praying that God would teach our church how to effectively use our gifts in a way that would give Him great glory.
After the second week I walked away desperately broken and in need of Christ. It was the day I finally admitted that I was completely lacking any sense of understanding for His will.
It's been a slow descent into an uphill battle but Jesus is working to bring healing and redemption to me. It's taking a lot of repentance, which hurts a lot, but it's also bringing me to a place of understanding, albeit slowly, which leads to joy.
After the third week, this past Sunday, I walked away educated. I now have far better understanding for what the gifts of the Spirit are and much information on them.
The point of the series though was far less on the what they actually are and far more on what is the purpose of the gifts.
aka - Why did God give His people gifts? Oh, to give Him glory in everything they do, to encourage the faith of those around them, to be encouraged individually at what God is doing, and to strengthen the Church. (plus more - go listen to that series)
A friend came over after church and we talked about the gifts. I asked her what she thought mine was and she immediately responded: faith
I was surprised. I often question the validity and strength of my faith. I turn to Christ often and feel a need to apologize for how I can so quickly seek counsel from anything but Him.
The past few months leading up the past couple weeks I've also felt more spiritual attacks in the area of faith then ever before.
I didn't fully dismiss my friends comment but I sort of dismissed it.
I figured she was probably wrong.
Surely my gift is leadership or wisdom or teaching or serving or shepherding, or any other one, I thought to myself.
Then I had my mentor/coach over for dinner a couple nights later.
Side note: I read an article a while back about being mentored. I highly recommend it. I'm certainly not very good at that list but I try to be a considerate mentee since I'm the one asking for time, advice, and wisdom. Check it out.
One of the questions I came in with (I had more than five, in fact I had eleven. I texted her the day before "in addition to dessert, can you please bring your wisdom?" to which she responded saying that she would try) was what do you think my spiritual gift is?
She too said faith.
In fact she, like the friend before said oh yeah, when I heard that part of the sermon I immediately thought of you.
I don't have a point in this post except to say:
Good job Jesus!
It truly is nothing of myself that I have faith. It's all His grace.
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.
(Ephesians 2:8-9 ESV)
I'm not quite sure what the what next part looks like for me, but I do know that I always want to give God glory in every action.
I want to meet Him and hear well done good and faithful one.
Words from God, the same God who created all words, will only come if I offer Him my words and works.
So that's what I'm doing.
Take 'em. Use 'em. Get glory.
I'll just sit here with my apparently big faith and trust in ya God!